Dear Friends,
Namaste!
This is the story of a gentleman called John Smith who, not so very long ago, used to live in his home called ‘Body’ along with his three beautiful wives named ‘Alpha’, ‘Beta’ and ‘Fat’. The country in which he lived had a currency called ‘Calories’ (just like Indian currency is ‘Rupees’ or American currency is ‘Dollars’).
John was quite fond of Fat and she had the entire home to herself (although she particularly liked her two bedrooms named ‘Stomach’ and ‘Hips’). Unfortunately, John was not so fond of his first two wives and they used to occupy their solitary place – a bedroom called ‘Pancreas’.
Although Alpha and Beta were not much favored, they were the more faithful and used to run the household diligently in whatever money John earned every month. Beta would use some amount to manage the house and store some in a safe called ‘Liver’. When John would run out of money, Alpha would withdraw the money from the safe and allow John to use the same.
However, there was a problem.
John was not a particularly methodical person. Sometimes, he used to earn a lot of money in one go and pass on the same to his wives. Beta would take only what was needed to run the household (and store some in the Liver). Then Fat, who was a confirmed spendthrift, would use the rest of the money to buy expensive items and deposit the same all over Body. Alpha and Beta disapproved of this as they thought the extra furniture only increased the maintenance of Body and added very little by way of beauty. However, they could not do much as John was hopelessly in love with Fat and more often than not, it was Fat who had her way!
At other times, John would bring in little or no money for a lengthy period of time. He would go back again and again to Alpha for taking the savings out of Liver. Alpha would reluctantly oblige (as there was no saying how much money John would bring in next and when) but even she would become helpless when there would be no cash left in the Liver.
Sometimes, John would bring in fake currency (empty calories). Poor Beta or Alpha could not use fake notes but Fat could somehow trade those and buy more furniture for depositing all over Body.
Alpha and Beta pulled on for some time but soon a time came when they were unable to run the household anymore. The house was already overfull with assets (or liabilities - according to Alpha and Beta) that Fat had bought, however, nothing was ever enough for her. John was unhappy because he would not get money from Liver when he needed most. Calories irregular inflow was showing no signs of improvement. In short, everyone was thoroughly unhappy!
This obviously led to a lot of arguments within the family and it started crumbling. At this juncture, John had the good sense of consulting a marriage counselor called Mr. Wise Dietician.
Dietician heard John out intently. Then he said to John, “You will have to change your job to save your family. The current job is too risky.”
“But there is a reward associated with that risk.” cried John, “I may not be making money on a few days, but when I do, it’s a bountiful!”
“You don’t need that much to run the family.” said Dietician firmly, “Regularity and predictability is more important. How else do you expect Alpha and Beta to plan expenditure?”
“What about Fat? If I take up a steadier job, hardly any money will be left for her! She is hot-headed and might even leave me!!”
“You will be none the worse for it!” retorted Dietician. “Frankly, I do not think Fat is adding any value in running Body smoothly.”
In spite of himself, John nodded.
“One more thing,” added Dietician, “Stop earning those fake calories. They are totally useless as far as running Body is concerned.”
“Understood” John said. Since he was quite serious about maintaining peace in Body and leading a happy life, he decided to give an earnest shot to Dietician’s advice.
He took up a job that gave him steady and frequent inflow of real calories. Beta started to run Body much better. Alpha started helping John out more willingly when he needed money from Liver. Fat, as expected, left John. She took all the extra deposits in Body with her.
The timing could not have been better for John as Fat was actually planning to very shortly invite her notorious anti-social relative, Diabetes, to stay permanently in Body.
John could not care less as he was genuinely becoming happier and Body was looking in great shape!
See you next Tuesday…
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